I'm afraid.
(Why are you afraid, Dino?)

I'm afraid because I don't think I'll be in your future...
and it'll be my own fault because soundtrack to suicide keeps playing on my mental stereo.

I've kinda come to terms with my mom not being around and that scares the fuck out of me as well. I feel like I forget to think about her un purposely (of course) but I still find my self forcing memories to come back to me. I feel like she's dying once more since all I know is mourning for her and now I'm not anymore and I'm not sure how to handle it. Like I feel if I'm happy about this I'll be wrong, and if I'm upset about it I'm also wrong.

I spent most of my life trying to find that comfort and once I found it. I was happy and then some signals got crossed and shit got switched and now I'm trying to get the comfort of that hug back.
I'm trying to get the girl who was so sure she wanted to be Mrs. Brandon J. Brown.
I understand she needs time to figure herself out. But I just wished it'd be quicker lol.
But we all know you can't rush perfection. (allthough she was already perfect in my eyes) I love you...and I hope things work out between us and if not then I hope things work out for both of us lol.

Well I'm outta here folks "Family Matters" is on and it's 5 in the morning.